Caveball – Inaugural Address

Jack MoneyJack MoneyThe Pulse1 Comment

Welcome, One and All ! Welcome to Caveball !

(DUC – Digression UpComing)

Sorry, can’t even get eight words out before I start going off on one of my rants. Although, this one is important for all of us. It has to do with the insufferable overuse of the exclamation mark. It appears everywhere now – more common than the common period. Which makes it, well, common.

“Have fun doing your taxes!”

“Don’t forget to take out the trash!”

“Good luck with your prostate exam!” (Well, this one kind of works, facetiously)

(DUC)

“Facetiously” is the only word in the English language that has all the vowels in order. (Thanks brain cells. Thanks for exhausting your synapses wisely)

Anyway, if I had the time I would start an Anti-! movement. But, since I don’t, I will attempt to do my part in abating the overuse of the one-time powerful force, in order to help restore a smidgen of its old majesty.

Once the season gets underway I will be recapping each day’s Fantasy relevance in “The Pulse”, Caveball’s home page. I vow to limit myself to just one “!” a week. Sound easy? Well, it won’t be! Damn! Oh, come on!

For instance, let’s say it was just announced that Jose Fernandez is going down for the year on Monday and then four days later Prince Fielder has played his last game of the season, as well, and I own them both on every team I “manage”. Do you think it’s going to be easy to stifle those pop-a-matic punctuations?

As you’ll see, I do tend to get worked up at times. Let’s face it, once the season has begun, Fantasy Baseball is about 7 % joy and 93% frustration. There are times I think it’s an escape for the masochist in all of us. It’s something we just don’t get from the daily bliss we experience with our ideal soul-mates and wonderful offspring.

So, yeah, I promise, just one “!” per week. Maybe I’ll let my avatar do all the exclaiming and emoting for me, depending on my frame of mind each day.

Incidentally, if it isn’t as obvious as we thought it would be, the name “Caveball” comes from all the Fantasy/spectator sports that we enjoy from the confines of our “mancave”, as depicted in the logo. Yeah, the name CAVEBALL “subtly” doubles as a sofa. 

In addition to “The Pulse”, Caveball will feature weekly articles and advice in “The Clubhouse”: “The Penthouse and the Doghouse” will review the elite and poor performers of the week; “The Sickhouse” reviews the latest injuries, and players coming off the DL; “The Guesthouse” will give advice on which players you might consider picking up on the waiver wire for the upcoming week or longer; and “Two-Start Pitchers” will have a tiered display of the coming week’s pitchers that are slated to have two starts.

In the meantime, leading up to that magical day in March (Draft Day), every Fantasy owner’s belated Christmas, Caveball will inundate you with all of our well-researched advice, including “Breakouts”, “Sleepers”, “Comebacks”, “Busts”, and a tiered system that is second to none. In fact, if you take just one piece of advice from Caveball, then I suggest it should be our “Chartfelt Tiers”, the ultimate Cheat-sheet for “draft day”, which will be released at the end of February.

It was an exciting and historic off-season with a plethora of acquisitions and moves not seen for over twenty years. Caveball will try to cover it all, from the unprecedented hype surrounding the Cubs young and acquired talent, to the facelift of the Padres’ outfield, to the addition of yet another ace to an already elite Nationals rotation, to the Red Sox’ retro offence-first squad, to the new-look and better-balanced Dodgers, to the White Sox suddenly looking like contenders, to the Marlins spending some serious coin, and to Billy Beane’s confounding attempt at getting into the “Guiness Book of World Records” for number of moves in one off-season.

So, to get you started, this Friday we will refresh and recap all of the significant off-season moves for position players, followed by a Monday article devoted to the pitchers who find themselves in new surroundings. We will not only predict the effect the acquisitions will have on their new team, but go over how it will impact the players’ former team, as well.

After years of experiencing the unpredictability of baseball, Caveball’s writers choose to avoid the word “expert”, and we prefer to think of ourselves as guides who analyze stats (to a fault), and keep up with the daily performances and transactions throughout the world of fantasy sports. 

At no time will we underestimate our readers’ knowledge (well, maybe a few of you). But seriously, we expect to glean as much from the Caveball community as we contribute. Together we can become a force. (stifling)

In closing, my fellow Fantasy owners: Ask not what your Caveball community can do for you – ask what you can do for your Caveball community.

No, wait. (stifling) Ask away.

Welcome.

 

OK, We know you guys have your opinions. So, let’s have ’em.
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One Comment on ““Caveball – Inaugural Address”

  1. monica22
    monica22

    Nice article, simply put “great sense of humor”.

    Best of lucks in this new adventure. I will keep coming back to read your articles.

    M

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